Ok folks its been a long while since last we pondered the possibility of pitting primarily pictorial people against each other in a fictional fight to the finish. Here, let me wipe off your screen…

So yeah, two of the greatest figures in Xbox 360’s short but lively action history, Marcus Fenix from Gears of War and Master Chief from the Halo series. Alright gentlemen, touch gauntlets come out fightin’!

It’s really easy to get caught up in the ultra-dorkness of how these two would fight each other, if they fought each other, and why they would fight each other. What universe would they be in? What weapons? MEH! Streamline dat…

So what I’ll start you off with is some facts about these two dukeroos, make an educated opinion, and allow the myriads of SquatSquat readers take it from there. And when I say myriads, I mean all 5 of us.

Marcus Fenix, a beast of a man but yet, just a man. He’s about 6 feet tall and around 231 pounds, not including his gear. Of war. Hah. But yeah, his armor isn’t much use other than allowing him to take a few direct hits of gun fire. No strength enhancements at all. And if anything, it actually hinders some of his strength and much of his mobility. He’s dead on with pretty much any weapon, in any conditions, and is for the most part devoid of any fear. Nice.

Spartan John-117, otherwise known as Master Chief, is a much different specimen of beast. He is a Spartan, a genetically modified superhuman with super strength. His armor is powered and gives him a slight edge in the strength department, being able to carry turret mounted guns with ease. While this strength doesn’t allow him Matrix-like leaping ability, it does provide him with his nifty regenerating shield system, similar to Fenix’s armor, allowing him to take some shots before biting the big one. Oh yeah, and he don’t git skeered, neither. Nice.

Ok, the common threads: Both are excellent marksmen. Both are adept at all weapons in existence, not to mention any vehicle they come encounter, alien or human. Both have a degree of protection due to their armor, and neither have any fear. They both work great in teams or great solo.

Let’s start breaking it down…

Master Chief can operate equally effective either in a team or alone. Fenix’s effectiveness goes way down without his team. Bummer. Point, MC.

While both men can recover from damage in a matter of seconds and finish the fight (muaha), Master Chief’s armor is significantly more effective at protecting him than Fenix’s armor. Point, MC.

Should both men be without their weapons, Master Chief, with his powered armor and superhuman Spartan spirit (WOO!), would certainly whup on Fenix not unlike Popeye taking it to Bluto after a can of greens.

Point, MC.

But doesn’t Fenix have ANY advantage!? Yes he does, and I got 4 words for you: Duck and cover. That’s right folks, our ole buddy Marcus Fenix uses anything and everything to duck behind and then clips you off at the knees from cover. Unfortunately for Master Chief, ducking behind an object and getting his wig lifted is an all too common occurance. So though Fenix is out-muscled and out-armored, his agility and knowledge of using surrounding objects as cover certainly leans the fight in his favor. Point, MF.

Interesting battle, no? It looks pretty even. Of course the fight would depend heavily on WHERE the battle of fought. Though, as I mentioned, I will not succumb to such dorkitry. (Too late)

For the win, Tronsta says DUM DUM DUM DUMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM…

Master Chief! Between his war experience, battle hardened nerves, superior armor and strength, knowledge of fine wines, and impeccable table manners, Master Chief, in my opinion, would certainly come out on top. And when I say come out on top, I mean turning Marcus Fenix into lots and lots of amoebas.

King’s to you…

This entry was posted on Wednesday, November 14th, 2007 at 4:47 pm and is filed under Action, Articles, Culture, Fighting, SquatMatch, Xbox 360. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.