A Time to Squat…
Posted March 7, 2006 at 12:14 pm by Spamalot
We all have busy schedules, and sometimes it’s hard to get enough time available to squat to your hearts content in the video game of your choice.
School, Work, Tupperware burping, and other obligations infringe on every gamer’s right to squat.
What do we do when responsibilities get in the way of our squat time? We squat in RL! (Real Life–for the n00bs out there)
When does your average squat addict do his/her victory dance in RL? I don’t know, but I can list some of my recent RL squats:
- While watching LOST last wednesday, when Ethan appeared out of nowhere playing Doctor to Claire, I squatted around the living room saying “Wuuuuuuuut!”. Ask my wife–She was embarrassed and there wasn’t even anyone else in the room!
- Every now and then I randomly simulate a squat in my seat at work. My workmates don’t yet know I’m a squat addict.
- When I see roadkill on the side of the road, I squat in my seat.
- The other day I was watching Spiderman, and Aunt May says to Uncle Ben “It’s okay, somehow we’ll survive” I squatted and said “No he wooooonnnn’t!”
- My laptop’s hard drive crashed and I’m sending it in for repair. I just gave it a couple of squats to send it on it’s way.
So when do you squat in RL?
BTW, the picture is me squatting a desk I accidentally destroyed while moving. LOL
March 7th, 2006 at 3:34 pm
dude, the Uncle Ben thing had me rolling. Soooo funny!
I squat when I’m at the video store and beat someone in a game that doesn’t have squatting. Naruto Ninja taisen 4 is one example.
Even with games that feature squatting, I still have to do it in real life. We all remember the post from a while back discussing Spammy and I visiting The Break and getting pwned by those azn dudes. Well before they got there, I beat Spammy a few times. I made sure to squat after every win.
March 7th, 2006 at 4:43 pm
I’ve seen the man squat a plate of chinese food. Literally.
March 7th, 2006 at 5:01 pm
Surprisingly, I also have seen that happen. Strange.
I squatted in my seat a million times while watching King Kong. I actually squatted my dog when wrestling with her last week. She bit me kinda hard and almost drew blood, so I slammed her on the ground and held her there a few seconds. She rolled over playing around, so I proceeded to squat the mutt, and in response she almost tore out my taint like Timoth Treadwell.
March 8th, 2006 at 8:25 am
A good chinese food combo plate doesn’t get eaten, it gets 0wned. That’s why I squatted that chinese food.
March 8th, 2006 at 10:13 am
Let’s analyze the squatting that a good plate of Chinese food gets…
1) Get’s squatted by the fork when you stab it.
Get’s squatted by the water treatment plant as it’s bathed in chemicals and burned out of existance.
2) Get’s squatted by your teeth when you chew it.
3) Get’s squatted by your throat as it gets pushed down to your stomach.
4) Get’s squatted by your stomach acid.
5) Get’s squatted by your intestines as they get pushed down like 3 miles of poop-lined roads.
6) Get’s squatted by your anus as it gets pushed out into the toilet.
7) Get’s squatted by the toilet as it gets flushed down the drain.
March 8th, 2006 at 6:47 pm
Gross, Tronny. Are you related to Chuck Palahniuk or something?
March 8th, 2006 at 11:53 pm
Chuck Palahniuk? His stuff gross?
BTW, the worst part about chinese food squat is thar your hungry 1/2 hour later!